It’s in the media and tabloid headlines: supermodel Christie Brinkley’s heated divorce from fourth husband Peter Cook, a handsome, successful businessman who she believed to be a "good" husband. However, talk of marital misconduct and addiction to pornography have surfaced, causing her to now believe otherwise.
My first reactions to the recent news reports have been mixed: anger at a cheating husband, hate for pornography, and a "what’s new?" cynical attitude at yet another celebrity marriage gone bad. Even fleeting heartless thoughts that Christie Brinkley’s supermodel image and Sports Illustrated swimsuit photos have actively participated in tearing down the moral fiber of families. Why should she be surprised when it comes back to destroy her own marriage and family?
But then gratefully, repentance gently seeped in and cleansed my heart of my thoughtless first reactions. My thoughts turned from condemnation to compassion, sorrow, and grief over the breaking of Christie’s heart and the tearing apart of her family. I began to recognize her as a woman who’s seemingly fairytale marriage took a terrible twist, instead of a celebrity who’s reaping what she’s sown.
In her supermodel pursuit, it probably wasn’t Christie’s intention to destroy relationships, families, and distort men’s minds through her sexy image. No, from her reaction now, it seems she was pursuing the same things most women want: a "good" marriage with a faithful husband. One report quoted her as saying, "All I ever wanted was a happy family." Perhaps she believed like most of us do at times, that the road to these "good" goals is to be the most outwardly beautiful and desirable woman possible.
Unfortunately as Christie has found out, it just isn’t true.
Thankfully, Scripture doesn’t leave women answerless when it comes to pursing a happy marriage. 1 Peter 3:1-4 gives us the outline on how to not only win the heart of a man, but more importantly, the heart of God. It doesn’t come with posing for magazine covers, swimsuit editions of men’s magazines, or being hailed as one of the most beautiful, sexy women in the world. Instead it’s found through culturally unconventional methods cultivated inwardly: a submissive attitude; chaste, respectful behavior; and a gentle and quite spirit. God says when a wife practices these, she can help bring a man who’s being led away by the temptations of the world and God’s call on his life to be a faithful husband, back home.
Wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
As a woman, it’s easy to be distracted and spend more time and energy working on my outside attributes and miss the most important aspects of my feminine qualities that matter more, the ones God says hold the true key to my husband’s heart.
Surprisingly, just as God turned my thoughts toward Christie from condemnation to compassion, He also changed my heart from thinking of Christie’s husband as just another "creepy" middle-aged guy. Instead, I began to see him as a man who’s also bought into a lie.
I don’t know his motives. Maybe he genuinely set out with a desire to be a good husband. Perhaps he thought marrying a supermodel guaranteed happiness and would protect him from struggling with the things men struggle with. After all, how many other men have tried to break free from pornography and thought marriage would fix them. (Marriage to a supermodel seems like the ultimate solution, at least that’s the theory.) And it’s not just non-Christian men, but also many who claim the name of Christ. But it never does, because it’s a heart matter — just like being beautiful as a woman is a heart issue.
Over the years, I’ve been learning the key for any woman to having a truly good marriage is much more about what’s happening on the inside of both partners than the outside. I’m glad God corrected my thoughts about Christie Brinkley and touched my heart with His gentle compassion. When it comes to heartache, whether a supermodel or stay-at-home mom, it hurts. I pray Christie discovers the true path to finding the happy family she’s always longed to have.
Welcome to Ungrind!
Do you want to be inspired, motivated, and equipped to live the everyday story of your life well?
If so, you’re in the right place. Whether you need encouragement in your relationships or in your faith, I hope you’ll find the transparent voices of mentors and friends here at Ungrind.
So, grab a cup of coffee and keep reading. We're so glad you're here!
Ashleigh Slater, Founder & Managing Editor
Get Our Free Ebook!
5 Ways to Live an Out-of-Control Life
Here are 5 ways to let go of control and trust your present and your future to God.
5 Creative Places to Find Prayer Accountability
Do you want to pray more, but are easily distracted? Here are some practical ways to stay focused.
How to Rescue a Day Gone Wrong in Your Marriage
Just because a day doesn't start well, doesn't mean you can't rescue it.
How To Change Your Life in 10 Minutes
Here's how you can change your life with a simple 10 minutes a day.
5 Ways to Teach Your Child to Hear God
Here are practical ways to help your child lean into the voice of God.
5 Strategies for Developing Lasting Love
These practical and biblical strategies can help you develop lasting love.
How the Psalms Speak to Our Emotions
The Psalms is a book that's rich with the reality of what life's like in this fallen world. Here are...
What Women Are Saying
--Rachel Starr Thomson, author of Heart to Heart: Meeting With God in the Lord's Prayer
"Real life is not always pleasant. Every marriage experiences disappointments, misunderstandings, sickness and financial crisis. Ashleigh doesn’t camouflage the pain in her own marriage, and offers practical ideas on how to walk through the difficulties and find intimacy on the journey. If you are anything like me, I predict that as you read, you too will find yourself laughing, wiping tears, and saying 'Oh, yes.'"
-- Gary Chapman, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The 5 Love Languages
We are a member of the Amazon affiliate program and regularly use affiliate links. If you purchase an item from an Amazon link we provide, we will receive a small referral commission. This doesn’t cost you anything additional. We only share books, music, and products that our writers personally have used and highly recommend.
Faith4 years ago
When Doing Justly, Loving Mercy, and Walking Humbly Stand at Odds
Motherhood4 years ago
Surviving a Strong-Willed Child
Faith4 years ago
7 Ways to Create A Family Altar
Friendship5 years ago
Beyond the Registry: The Ultimate Gift Guide for Expectant Parents
Relationships4 weeks ago
5 Ways to Teach Your Child to Hear God
Marriage5 years ago
4 Reasons I’m Not Facebook Friends With My Husband
Everyday Faith4 years ago
6 Simple Ways to Give Thanks in the Thick of It
Articles5 years ago
10 Ways Life is Like a Box of Chocolates
Articles7 years ago
How to Lift Up the One You Love
Articles5 years ago
Relationships6 months ago
Facing Our Motherhood Fears
Articles8 years ago
June Cleaver Syndrome