I want to say yes more.
Yes to pitchers of lemonade.
Yes to one more lap around the neighborhood on bikes.
Yes to popcorn for dinner.
Yes to bowls of water carried outside for toy “car washes”
Yes to digging in the mud with my wooden cooking spoons.
Yes to little hands flipping the pancakes.
Yes to jumping on the trampoline for “ten more minutes.”
Yes to jumping on the trampoline WITH you.
Yes to “just one more” book read aloud.
Yes to staying up “just a little bit longer.”
Yes to the jar for collecting worms.
Yes to stopping for ice cream.
Yes to tables covered in brushes, paint, and masterpieces.
Yes to putting on swim suits and turning on the hose.
Yes to crumbly, gets everywhere Play Doh.
Yes to those alluring Rolos in the check-out line.
Yes to binge watching the Brady Bunch.
Yes to blanket forts.
Yes to playing outside long after bedtime.
Yes to the cousin sleepover.
Yes to decorating the table with flowers picked out of my flower pots.
Yes to looking into little eyes and listening to “just one more thing.”
Yes. Yes to being more intentional about finding things to say yes to.
This momma has found lots of reasons to say no far too often. Too much to do. Too distracted. Too much to manage. Too tired. Too messy. Too unhealthy. Too unsafe. Too hard. Too risky. Too time consuming. Or, I’m too grumpy.
I have four young kids. I am crossing very few things off my to do list beyond meals, laundry, and homework. I am not in the get ahead stage in my parenting life. I’m just squeaking by and trying to make it to bedtime without too many tears or too many household items destroyed. I know the season that I’m in, yet I still make an idol of order. I still expect so much productivity that I miss yes moments. Moments that would bring joy, but are avoided because I fear the chaos and dread taking off my “manager of all things” badge.
It doesn’t feel like I have margin for more yeses. It’s much easier to manage and control my kids with lots of nos. Because I am still tired, still have too much to do, and still can be on the grumpy side, sometimes saying yes is a stretch. But I still think there is more room for saying, “Yes, kids. Why not?”
They’ll always be nos. Moms of little curious boys can’t possibly not say no and moms of creative girls have to set limits. And I’m still that momma who places high value on creative, outdoor play, minimal screen time, respectful behavior, and healthy eating. But I’m planning to say yes more. Not all the time, just more.
I want to think through what I’m saying no to. I want to embrace the “picking my battles” mentality. Is it really a big deal if my six year old sits on the arm of the chair? Really impossible to wipe up the table after little Monets beg to paint? Really that damaging to add sprinkles to scoops of ice cream? There have been too many nos.
For the last few weeks, I’ve been actively looking for yeses. It requires brief releases of my grip on order, my task list, and our schedule. The results? More smiles. More belly laughs. Theirs and mine. Fun mom shows up more often and my kids learn lessons about surrendering to the moment.
I have this window of time with my kids. This crazy gift of days lived with creative, silly, adventure loving little people. This life is bursting at the seams with moments that I can miss or seize.
More yeses, fewer nos. It’s as simple as that. No twelve step plan, just intention.
“Whenever possible say yes. They are only kids once!” -Marjorie Pay Hinckley
Welcome to Ungrind!
Do you want to be inspired, motivated, and equipped to live the everyday story of your life well?
If so, you’re in the right place. Whether you need encouragement in your relationships or in your faith, I hope you’ll find the transparent voices of mentors and friends here at Ungrind.
So, grab a cup of coffee and keep reading. We're so glad you're here!
Ashleigh Slater, Founder & Managing Editor
Get Our Free Ebook!
To Those Who Want To Be Truly Happy: Stop Chasing Happiness
Chasing happiness isn't all it's cracked up to be. Here are a few reasons why.
How the Psalms Speak to Our Emotions
The Psalms is a book that's rich with the reality of what life's like in this fallen world. Here are...
3 Ways to Navigate Personality Differences
Sometimes personality differences can wear on us. Here are three ways we can navigate them in a loving manner.
Surprised By ‘A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood’
If you haven't seen this film, God may speak to your heart through it in ways you weren't expecting.
The Wedding Ring
Are you struggling in your marriage? Here's how a wedding ring helped one wife fight for her marriage.
5 Ways to Live an Out-of-Control Life
Here are 5 ways to let go of control and trust your present and your future to God.
5 Creative Places to Find Prayer Accountability
Do you want to pray more, but are easily distracted? Here are some practical ways to stay focused.
What Women Are Saying
-- Darlene Schacht, author of Messy Beautiful Love: Hope and Redemption for Real-Life Marriages and co-author of Reshaping it All: Motivation for Spiritual and Physical Fitness
"Real life is not always pleasant. Every marriage experiences disappointments, misunderstandings, sickness and financial crisis. Ashleigh doesn’t camouflage the pain in her own marriage, and offers practical ideas on how to walk through the difficulties and find intimacy on the journey. If you are anything like me, I predict that as you read, you too will find yourself laughing, wiping tears, and saying 'Oh, yes.'"
-- Gary Chapman, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The 5 Love Languages
We are a member of the Amazon affiliate program and regularly use affiliate links. If you purchase an item from an Amazon link we provide, we will receive a small referral commission. This doesn’t cost you anything additional. We only share books, music, and products that our writers personally have used and highly recommend.
Faith4 years ago
When Doing Justly, Loving Mercy, and Walking Humbly Stand at Odds
Motherhood4 years ago
Surviving a Strong-Willed Child
Faith5 years ago
7 Ways to Create A Family Altar
Friendship6 years ago
Beyond the Registry: The Ultimate Gift Guide for Expectant Parents
Relationships8 months ago
5 Ways to Teach Your Child to Hear God
Marriage6 years ago
4 Reasons I’m Not Facebook Friends With My Husband
Everyday Faith5 years ago
6 Simple Ways to Give Thanks in the Thick of It
Articles6 years ago
10 Ways Life is Like a Box of Chocolates
Articles7 years ago
How to Lift Up the One You Love
Articles6 years ago
Relationships1 year ago
Facing Our Motherhood Fears
Digging Into Scripture5 months ago
How the Psalms Speak to Our Emotions